Joan and I are going to a place that sells both music instrument stuff and Apple tech. While she gets her bassoon reeds, should take this disk tray in and ask for recommendations on computer to utilize these. WhatDaYaThink? Would they even know what these are?
Note: This was from our business’ first computer software installation (early 80’s). I remember liking Word Perfect better than Word. Software was on 20+ disks, plus …. well you can see the 4th disk for printer installation. #floppydisks
In April 2003, while serving in the Hawaii State Legislature, Gabbard ENLISTED in the Hawaii Army National Guard. In July 2004, she was deployed for a 12-month tour in Iraq, serving as a specialist with the Medical Company, 29th Support Battalion, 29th Infantry Brigade Combat Team.
She served in the US Congress from 2013-21 and believes her criticism of VP Harris caused her placement on a TSA’s watchlist. She is NOT a conservative and NOT (yet) a republican. She has endorsed President Trump.
For every flight, because her boarding passes have an “SSSS” designation, she is followed by (according to Air Marshalls):
2 explosive detection K9 teams
1 explosives specialist
1 plain clothes TSA officer
3 Federal Air Marshals
Every flight is preceded by a “very in-depth screening” lasting 30-45 minutes
If you have a non-political reason why she was placed on a terror watchlist, please share. This is shameful.
author of “Bad Therapy: Why the Kids Aren’t Growing Up”
I periodically listen to interviews conducted by Marissa Streit, a former classroom teacher. The title of this one caught my eye so I listened. As I did, I noted down some near quotes that I hear. These are not polished…. but give you an idea of the discussion. I didn’t agree with everything said, in particular, the parts about allowing children to walk home alone from school (or have I been affected by the hype?)…. But she kinda answers a thought I’ve had….. Why did we not have these problems, at least as pronounced, when we were kids? I don’t ever remember ‘mental health, PTSD and therapy being nearly as prominent as they seem today. I don’t intend to read the book, but parents of young children my gain from hearing this interview.Before you attack one of the comment/notes, listen to that part of the podcast and think critically about why you want to say what you want to say….and thank you for that.
Have America’s Classrooms Become Profit Centers for the Mental Health Industry?
Why does every child talk about having anxiety?
Why are our children swimming in mental health therapy?
1 in 4 young people identifying as trans. (Girls 7th grade).
Everybody needs therapy.
Everyone is broken.
A generation that is in profound distress.
The largest patient pool for mental health therapy are from the public schools. (CA)
Trams-informed care.
Every child has emotional damaged.
Instead of sending kids to the principal, they are now sent to the counselor.
Schools as a mental health ward.
SEL Social Emotional LearningTrojan house.Teachers are not therapists.
How are you feeling? Think of a time when (pain).
Trauma informed care.
Being born black means you’ve been traumatized.
Break the family
Over medicate children
If you wanted to break them down, there would be no better way than what is currently being taught in schools under the heading of mental health.
But… we have to keep them from suicide. How to find the line.
…the child who has never thought about it is forced to think about it.
…the child who HAS thought about it….
Does your child have a serious problem you cannot fix by changing their environment? If you cannot stabilize them that way, then yes. Therapist….but research the therapist the way you would research a surgeon.
Reset the default. Step 1 should not always be therapy and medication.
Some will need it and they should get it, but we are overreacting every childcreating mental disorder.
Hardship can be good for you. Certain kinds of adversity is really good for kids. Tell them the truth…that resilience is the story of the human condition. Most kids will emerge resilient. Tell them their parents went through hard things. Their grandparents went through hard things. Most will recover….a small percentage will really need professional help.
We don’t teach history so much as we’re teaching victim-hood. We don’t even teach them their own history. We need to connect them to their grandparents…what they went through. What their family, their ancestors went through.
You can get through it…because the vast majority will.
Feelings are always front and center. Being crushed under the weight of their own feelings.
PTSD traumatizing.
There are people who need help.
Kids need authority, community, independence. I can walk home from school… or to the store…or cook dinner.
I’m not shy. I have social depravity.
I’m not worried….i have anxiety.
Once you have anxiety, you need an expert to help you and you need a drug.
“You can’t say that. “
Disagreeable personality.
Don’t let someone diagnose them unless they really have a problem.
Terminology
SEL (Social Emotional Learning). Everything is a psychological program and requiresgroup (classroom) therapy.
Memory poker (as in the game). Group setting, kids trying to “1 up” each other. Exaggerating and talking yourself into the idea that you have been traumatized.
And all this is happening instead of academics.
Parentify. Parental abuse. Why do immigrant kids do so much better? Strong parenting. Chores and helping family and community are expected. Immigrant kids running toward adulthood and American kids staying home on mamas couch because they’ve been traumatized. The world is against them.
Trauma. There are traumatized kids, but we apply it to everyone.
There is a reason why we didn’t hear these terms as children.
Trust “Parenting expert”….only if he/she raised good kids to adulthood. Not a book learned only. Books by parenting experts who have never had children. (I remember thinking this way about the college professors in the Education School who had never been away from the college campus telling us how to teach.
Cheer for first half, band for halftime, back to cheer for 2nd half
One of my all time favorites because it shows commitment and dedication. This girl is a cheerleader during the first half of the game, then, while the other cheerleaders have a break, she runs to the band, grabs her drum and marches halftime…..and then back to cheer for the rest of the game.
I made two very small political donations to out-of-my-district candidates I couldn’t vote for, but whose positions I liked. Two complaints.
First, they make the $10-$20 donation process difficult as all the ‘defaults’ during the process are for a higher amount that automatically repeats monthly or quarterly. Ohhhhh, the lists those donations put me on.
I also donated to PragerU, a cause and operation I support, even though I don’t benefit directly from all their children’s books and programming. I have watched and learned from several of their 5-minute videos on various topics and enjoy some of the interviews and programming shows they provide. I will probably donate to them again. But wow….do they ever have me on their list(s) now. Opportunities to support this cause or that one, to have my donation doubled or tripled (but only today)….. And they even use the USPS.
Of course, we all know that if you click on something in Y-ville or F-whatchamacallit… that you are doomed for an almost never-ending onslaught of similar things to watch, read or support.
The only entity I support significantly and regularly is my church and some of the specially targeted mission programs it supports. I won’t get into the thousands of missionaries or of the emergency services and help in times of disaster and for people in need — because that is not my main focus of this post.
Just today (so far) and it is not even noon yet…. I have been asked to support, via email, text, and the tentacles of social media:
both presidential candidates (one just wants $1, yeah right). But today, not tomorrow.
both vice presidential candidates “if I can afford it”
a senator, who “for less than a cup of Joe – just $5” will make the senate his political color
PragerU
Daily Wire
Israel
Not today (yet), but I periodically hear from:
my university (I do enjoy the student callers)…
my university’s school of music – I even sent postcards to prospects on their behalf
My university’s philanthropic dept
several candidates (both major parties)
Newsmax (and others) want me to ‘vote’ or participate in a poll, but I’m confident those will lead to a donation opportunity.
Recently, I received a letter with the return address of President Donald J. Trump. I was going to post it on Facebook (denied) on Instagram (denied) and X (denied). Maybe there really was something wrong with the way I took the pic….but that is why I did not include it in this post.
Most who offer audio or video podcasts advertise and also offer a subscription for a variety of benefits. There was one I really liked, but she stopped all “free” and went subscription only. I didn’t follow. But NOW… she’s back.
I use Unroll Me app to reduce emails….somewhat successfully.
Sending “STOP” on texts is a joke. That just confirms the number and adds me to to other lists.
If you donate everything away, will the government replace it?
What’s your story? How do you avoid/reduce them? Or can you? Advice appreciated. Attackers not.
Teen years can be trying times. Parents may be fighting, separating, dating and remarrying, which means the teen now has to not only deal with a break up of a foundation in his/her life, but often now has to live in multiple households. Some have to adjust to step-siblings, job losses, financial struggles and more.
Then, there are the complexities of school with seemingly unending pressures to perform, trying to get through the dating games, often without an anchor or example to follow. Influenced by increasingly negative social standards, or lack of standards….. teens can get caught in the rise and falling tides.
Most learn how to negotiate life’s trying currents, but can turn the wrong way, make a miscalculation or poor decision — and find themselves high and dry on the beach…..and they need help. Not every student needs, wants or will accept a teacher’s help. Sometimes the teacher’s effort is both unappreciated and unsuccessful.
Teens will listen if they respect and trust. Trust is one of the most valuable mentoring requirements.
I was in 9th grade when my band director, who had heard I wanted to be a band director, pulled me aside to tell me that 1) being a band director would require going to college, 2) my family couldn’t afford it, and 3) he had a way, “make yourself valuable”.
My parents divorced my 7th grade year. Dad was a firefighter and Mom, a polio survivor, was left raising five kids….I was the oldest.
Mr. Copenhaver emphasized that my grades weren’t good enough for academic scholarships and pointed out that I wasn’t athletic, so he told me the only way I would get there was to be good enough at something that a school would pay for me to come. He said I was decent on clarinet and suggested I focus on that. I had 4yrs to prepare. He helped me get 1-1 instruction with the best teacher in the region, to attend summer camps at two universities, to partipcate in band clinics, solo/ensemble festivals and honor bands — for both the experience and the exposure. It worked. I made myself valuable.
I did have a loan (don’t remember the amt). Of course, the number was lower, but my first teaching job only paid about $10k, so all the numbers were lower. I had on and off-campus jobs, including (for a while) a 3rd shift cleaning job at a restaurant and a job I went to over breaks and around summer schedules. I rode my bike about 3-4 miles to an area high school 2-3 times a week to work with about 15 students until I got my first car in time for student teaching.
I do remember learning how to pay my bills, including deciding which ones I could pay after each teaching paycheck. I get that.
Are there problems with the system today? Absolutely. College prices are outrageous. When our younger son was in school, their prices increased $1000/yr — and are now double what they were when we were dealing with them. Schools can raise their fees because loan-makers make it easy to get higher loans to pay the higher fees. Many universities (including state schools) have billions (with a B) endowments. They could go tuitionless for at least several years. Meanwhile, the cycle keeps going.
The contractor we hope will soon get us on his schedule is driving a truck I could never afford. He told me he dropped out of college when he figured out that, instead of debt, he could quickly be making more than he would make with the degree he was working on. A military recruiter told our band class that going his route could enable someone to have 6-figures in the bank instead of 6-figures in debt.
I would hope we can find a way to help the needy without just transferring that obligation to those who couldn’t go to college or who went to trade school (and borrowed money for buildings, vehicles, tools, etc) or into the military instead.
Blanket cancellations (which I know this is not): the SCHOOL wins because they got their money and can now raise prices again, the LOAN-MAKERS win because they can make bigger loans.
Somebody a lot smarter than me is going to have to figure it out. I do not believe it is an easy solution.
If you want to respectfully respond, even to disagree, feel free. If you’re going to call me a non-Christian, selfish or some of the other names I’ve been called (like these twitter responses):
Selfish shell fish
Special snowflake
Ignorant to the rest of the world
Sweetie
Conversation of which I know nothing
You ASSume things
smarmy asshats
I looked at your profile pic (old, fat, bald)
all quoted from a collegiate presentation called, “How We Did It” that I made to parents several times when I was teaching. All text is from “Hillbilly Elegy”.
Years ago, my son gifted me a book, “Hillbilly Elegy” by J.D. Vance. His was a more extensive experience of poverty than mine. I grew up in northern Kentucky while his Appalachian upbringing was a little over 100 miles away….from an area with a genuine Kentucky hillbilly life. I’m glad I didn’t have a foul-mouthed grandmother or drug-user family members in my family … but there were aspects of his young life that had recognizable similarities to mine.
How you can go from that to graduating Ohio State in 2 yrs and Yale is an impressive success story.
I’ve seen attack media describe his book as mediocre and that he maligned poor people — WRONG… he was describing his reality. And the book was made into a movie. (I liked the book better)
I used quotes from one page of his book in my “How We Did It” Collegiate presentation I gave to students/parents while I was teaching, because I totally agree with, and experienced via my younger son, the fact that you don’t have to be rich to get into a top-tier university.
With our younger son getting into a top-tier undergrad school and then an Ivy League grad school, our experience was in the same universe as Vance’s, hence my use of this quote from his book.
For a short time during my earliest teen years, without concern about walking to and into his home, I studied piano with a single guy who lived a few blocks away. During high school freshman year, I took lessons with a college girl who came to our school and went with me into a sound-proofed practice room. Later in high school, I would travel weekly to an area band director’s home for instruction. Concerns about safety transparency and reputation never came up.
But times are different now. Priests, coaches, and teachers are convicted of having inappropriate relationships with children and students, creating a sensitive and suspicious society that dissuades good teachers and students from participating in the time-tested tradition of individualized instruction.
The concept of innocent until proven guilty does not apply. No one can afford even an accusation. A School of Performing Arts that provides private lessons for area children put windows in all the classroom doors, instituted a parental sign-in/out procedure, and has a staff member walk in on every lesson every time. Band directors schedule lessons in busy offices or in large ensemble rooms full of distractions. College students video lessons with middle/high school students, not only for critique but also for security.
One band director told me that
…you don’t have to be guilty….an accusation can destroy a reputation and/or cost your job. And unfortunately, even after proven innocent, the doubts, questions and hesitations can continue to damage a reputation that took decades to build. Teachers have to be soooo careful.
The very nature of individualized music instruction almost mandates that student and teacher be alone in a room with a closed door. How do we take the legitimate safety concerns that student, parent, and teacher share along with the teacher’s concern for reputation (and employment) and still provide specialized, accelerated training?
SAFETY is everyone’s concern even if from different perspectives. Be aware and be careful.
TEACHERS…
invite parents to sit in or be nearby during lessons.
My experience: When I teach 1-1 lessons in my home, parents can relax in my living room while I work with the student in the dining room. A 6th grader’s mother would bring a book and sit in the room.
leave a door open or at least ensure it is unlocked and/or has a window. Enable anyone to walk in on you. That delay while you get up to open the door from the inside can cause undue suspicion or concern (and increase interruption time).
schedule lessons when others are around. Avoid evenings or non-school days when teaching at school or make sure someone else is home if the student is coming to your home studio. Do everything reasonable to remove any question andensure both student and parent are comfortable. Keep in mind that teens are increasingly cautioned to beware of one-on-one situations with adults. Respect that.
My experience: When a mother requested I work with her student over holiday break, I scheduled it at school along with an appointment for another teacher to drop something off to me during the lesson time. I left the band room door opened and set up the chairs in clear view from the hallway so passing janitors could see and hear.
video or audio record the session. Make sure everyone knows. Place the camera so both teacher and student are visible, but NOT in a way that makes the student uncomfortable or could set you up for a different kind of complaint.
My experience: When I teach lessons via Skype, I ask that the camera be pointed so that I can see either fingers, embouchure or both, so I am usually looking at a profile view of the student’s top front. When girls start adjusting their clothes, there is some discomfort. Be aware, empathetic, and be careful. Explain your reasoning — or move the camera to remove the discomfort.
if you have a regular coaching schedule, post the schedule. If you have a website with a calendar, parents (and students) are better reminded and informed.
PARENTS…
check references. In addition to safety, you want to make sure you’re getting a good product (teacher). If the teacher is an outsider coming to the school, the school should have conducted a background check. Ask.
sit in or be in the area, at least periodically. Sitting in an adjacent room can provide reasonable privacy while often enabling you to hear your child play. They won’t do that for you at home, right? Bring a book.
for virtual lessons (via Skype, for example), be in the area. You don’t have to stand over the child’s shoulder, but listen in and even walk in a couple times….say hi to the teacher.
STUDENTS…
meet a new teacher for the first time with a parent and in public.
go with your gut.
if anything makes you uncomfortable, speak up or get out. Nearly 100% of the time, you are either mis-interpreting or the teacher is completely unaware and will respond and adjust. Don’t destroy an opportunity based on your misunderstanding a teacher’s oversight.
if a parent is dropping you off, have a cell phone to call if the teacher is not there, you finish early (or going over), or you otherwise need parental pick up.
My experience: It was during a storm and I was mid-lesson after school when the power went out. Emergency lighting came on, but not enough to continue.
if you are going to a lesson, tell your parents (or someone) when, where and for how long.
My experience: I’ve had an unnecessarily disgruntled parent when I scheduled some after school coaching with a student who never got around to communicating and mom didn’t know what was going on ’til the student didn’t get off the bus. My mistake was assuming the parent knew.
TRANSPARENCYhelps everyone.
Sometimes there is a drop off in parental involvement and in student/parent communication during high school. Teens want more responsibility and independence and both parent and teacher should strive to help them in those areas. Assumptions often cause problems, however, and most issues I’ve ever experienced in the triangular relationship with parent and student elevate because somebody “assumed”. Several years ago, I gave each of my business office employees a personalized, engraved magnet that said, simply:
Assume Nothing!
TEACHERS…provide a list of expectations and policies.
Payment. How much, how often and what happens when they don’t. Are materials (music) included?
Cancellations when you cancel, when student cancels, how much notice and what if there isn’t any?
Minimum requirements; lessons per month, practice time, materials such as tuners or metronome, a functioning instrument with adequate supplies (reeds, etc)…
Privacy. Don’t share student/parent contact info or details about what happens during lessons. That is why they are called “private” lessons.
Communication. Be easy to contact. Determine whether your communication is to be with the student or parent. Any written communication with the student should be copied to a parent, when possible, including texts, emails or other types of media messages.
REPUTATIONS are slow to build and quick to crumble.
Students and parents need to realize how important that is to the teacher, especially when their very livelihood depends on it. Younger or single teachers need to be hyper-aware, but no one is too old, fat, bald or ugly for legitimate concern and caution.
Without an element of TRUST, this simply cannot work. Hopefully, the teacher has ‘earned’ some trust from both the student and the parental. It is unfortunate that we hear via national news when trust has been abused. That is horrible. But it is also a very, VERY small percentage of people. My advice to all…. in a nutshell: